Another Tale from Internet Dating...

So I got this message which said something to the effect of: If you are interested in a down to earth guy who doesn't want sex message me back.

Needless to say, I am not interested in someone who does not want sex. I am the quintessential sex fiend. (Well, not really, but I like the sex.) That being said I went to his profile to see if he was worth at least pursuing a friendship with. I mean, I'm a fan of friendships. I like talking to people. However, nothing really jumped out and I just wasn't all that interested in him. In fact, he seemed rather blah in the personality department. Now, that could be just the way that he wrote his profile or that he really was blah. I don't know. I don't pretend to know. So as there was no hope for this guy, I deleted the message that he sent me and decided to get on with what I was doing for the rest of the day... nothing. Wee!

Not five minutes after I deleted the message I get another one. Ok, ok. I've had guys message me twice before. I've had the pleading second message. They're kind of sad and pathetic and you almost want to send message back telling them that it'll be alright, don't worry, you'll find someone.

This was not that message. This was this message:

You should not be so stuck up. have fun with the horny guys. you would not know a decent guy if it bit ya on the ass

Umm... What does one say to that? I mean really and truly, what does one say? I was going to go on about how he obviously has an inability to properly construct sentence and wouldn't know proper grammar if it bit him on the ass. But that's not what came out. What came out was something else.

Here is my response:

One: I am not stuck up. I do not reply right away, ever. Or I usually do not reply right away, as I like to think about things before I do them. I've managed to meet some fairly creepy people on here and because of that I like to look over the profile and then think about it for a bit before I reply. I think that it's allowed. However I've decided to judge you as a special case, and therefore you get an immediate reply. Congratulations!

Two: Get over yourself. Does it make you feel any better about yourself that sent a mean spiteful message after you didn't get an immediate reply? I mean seriously, who do you think you are? Do you send everyone a second when they don't respond within a set time frame? Or is it only after they delete your first message? Because that is really and truly woefully pathetic.

Three: Please do not comment on me. You do not know me. I realise that this may sound somewhat hypocritical after my last two points but in light of what seems like an obvious inability to realise that not everyone needs to jump when you say jump, I feel that I am justified. I do not need to reply to you. There is nothing here that says I do. I very rarely reply to people. Something has to catch my attention either in the message or failing that in the profile. And then, I still think about it. Why should I reply to ever Tom,****and Harry? Especially if there is nothing that attracts me?

Four: I hate to be this blunt, but you don't attract me. Either physically or with your personality, which is entirely more important. I do not consider myself a vain or shallow person but personality is something that I need. I have a very strong personality, I don't like it when the people around me do not have strong personalities. I tend over power them and it's boring. So while I am sure that you are nice and possibly interesting person, I don't have an interest to get to know you. And I don't have to. It's allowed.

Finally... Just a piece of advise, if someone doesn't reply. Don't take it personally. Move on, talk to someone new. Maybe they are not looking for someone who just wants to talk, maybe they are looking for someone to boff their brains out. Maybe they are looking for someone who wants a serious relationship. Or maybe, they're kind of like me and not really sure what they are looking for. They know what they are not interested in but not what does peak their fancy. sh*thappens, life goes on. Stop being bitter and spiteful.

So what do you think? And additionally, what would you have responded?


EDIT: So apparently he read and deleted my message back without comment. And here I was hoping that we could continue our little tussle. What ever happened to verbal sparing? Are people just unable to hold up a decent argument anymore?